my 3 survival tips for when stuff hits the fan
Up until recently, I felt like 2018 and the universe teamed up for the ultimate collaboration of let’s mess with Farah. A series of tiny upsets and setbacks ensued followed by a few grandiose punches to the gut and then a couple take my breath away moments. Needless to say, I felt defeated. In the past when I grappled in what felt like a totally unfair round of tug of war, it usually ended with me on the ground with rope burns from holding on too tight. So after forty years of rope wrapped stubborn hands from tugging with all my heart and might, I decided to let go on this round. It was the best decision I made in a long time. The decision to finally let go led to a pure understanding of all the revelations exposed to me in pieces over the years in the form of upsets and disappointments.
Choice Supremacy
Sometimes in chaos we impulsively react forgetting we have ultimate control over how we want to respond, the type of energy we want to release and how much we are willing to give. In the past, when I’ve let go or walked away it didn’t always feel like it was my choice but rather something forced to better cope or stop pain and frustration. This round, when I paused and consciously made the choice to let go, I felt empowered because I truly believed with 100% certainty in my own ability to walk away without trying to fix, fight or understand it. I had full authority over my thoughts and actions and how I governed them- this my friends is what I call choice supremacy and you have it too.
“ I felt empowered because I truly believed with 100% certainty in my own ability to walk away without trying to fix, fight or understand it.”
Slow Down
Stuff starts hitting the fan and then sticking to the walls when I just don’t have the time to deal. This seems to happen when life’s pace feels like it’s on fast forward and busier than ever. This is where the tiny upsets and setbacks and what I acknowledge as “first world problems” make appearances. One of my recent first world problems included my mother spilling her coffee all over my car and on the same day my daughter puking all over the back seat. What are the chances? Pretty high if the universe is trying to snag your attention. I believe when a chain reaction of not so great shit starts to happen all at once, it is the universe’s way of trying to screech me (and you) to a halt. So now, if I am on the receiving end of what may appear to be ill fated luck, after I tap into my choice supremacy, I pause and slow the heck down. Slowing down for me means more no’s and less yes’s- pretty simple.
“I believe when a chain reaction of not so great shit starts to happen all at once, it is the universe’s way of trying to screech me (and you) to a halt.”
When Will This Really Matter?
When I’m in the thick of life’s crossfire or faced with making a tough decision I ask myself “Is this going to matter next week? Will it matter next month? Will it matter next year? You would be surprised how much of what we stress about does not actually matter and will not matter in the long run. I have practiced this thought process for a couple years now and it works. It also helps highlight the stress that does matter - the stress in life that is worth putting on a cape, rolling up your sleeves and fighting for. But more often, it is a reminder that whatever it is, likely will not matter once it’s released from my thoughts. Period.
Final thought- I had it all wrong. The almighty collaboration of the universe and 2018 was not intended to mess with me, but to gift me. So I am writing this to share my gift with you. When shit starts hitting the fan and sticking to the walls reach into your arsenal of choice supremacy, slow down and ask yourself when will it matter, if ever?
Be Well,
xo
